Thank you all for the kind replies.
I think whatever issue with the pics have straightened itself out, but let me know if it acts up.
Best,
-BT
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Turn 1: Eldar
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Farseer Dunkas nodded when he saw that the Orks were caught flat-footed.
"Release the Warhost, let them fall like the vermin they are."
With a mental nod, a pair of lightning-fast Hemlock Wraithfighters flew over the battlefield, D-scythe energy tearing Orks apart with ease.
Perhaps the battle would be over before it even began...
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Objectives:
Supremacy, Scour the Skies, Assassinate, Defend Objective 4, Strands of Fate (Objective 3), Secure Objective 6
Well, the Eldar go first and my opponent takes some time to admire my massive horde (i.e. look for targets). Not seeing anything that looks bigger (or nastier I assume), he pushes up his Hemlocks to try and block my way to his backfield.
He disembarks his Dark Reapers, Farseer and Warlock. Then, mass shooting kind of starts with some attempts to try and thin my Stormboy Horde. Sadly, the anti-tank doesn't take too much out of the ladz, and I end up only losing about a half-dozen or so. As an aside, he decides to smite some of my Grotz for the laffs.
He keeps kind of closed in, not going for objective three yet, so no points for the Eldar atm...
Picture Caption: While a bazooka works pretty well to take down a gnat, it's kind of overkill...
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Turn 1: Orks
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Throwing a look over his shoulder, Brother-Captain-Primaris-Sergeant Skarbutz checked his ladz. The Stormboyz were ready to show their worth. Their packs were loaded up with special squig-fuel and their Rockets were freshly pained the reddest red. They'd do the job straight-up.
A derisive snort brought his attention to Big Louie, who had their arms crossed and shaking their head.
Skarbutz had never trusted the Warphead. Grumgutz had said that Louie was an Ork, but Skarbutz had heard rumours. They sounded pretty daft about how Louie had once been a slave Grot Panzee that had broken free, stolen da powers of Mork n' Gork and now was a propa Ork. Skarbutz shook his head at that. Crazy talk's all it was.
But, Louie was kind of weedy lookin'...
He'd better give a good impression if'n he wanted to shut the Warphead up.
Sparking his Rocket pack he opened up both fuel outlets to the startled gasps of his mates. One line was enough to send you high as a Gorkanaut. Two was right Madboy-level of crazy. But, he hadta be there first. And as the rocket ignited, Skarbutz tore off into the sky with an enormous burst of speed. He barely had time to strap down his goggles before the sky went by with an enormous blur and he could swear that somehow, somewhere he saw the faint figure of Big Mek Wazdakka himself givin' him the thumbs up.
So when he passed by the pair of Panzee planes with the pilots givin' him funny looks, it was almost par for course. His lads followed him and they landed in a jumble near the front. Not even a dozen Panzees stood in front of him, and Skarbutz was itchin' for a fight.
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Behind the harrowing assault, Lorilune shook her head. Insanity. The Stormboyz had thrown themselves at Hemlock Wraithfighters and had somehow outmaneuvered the Eldar fliers. The Seers would be half-dead with shame for such a misstep. Still, something had to be done before the Hemlocks turned around and turned the Orks into soul-burnt husks.
She glared at the two packs of Tankbustas, who looked with glee at the incoming planes. It was a long shot, but perhaps something could be done to turn the tide.
"You lot," she growled, "Reform positions. Unify your squads and commence tactical bombardment."
There was confused blinking amongst the Orks and Lorilune sighed in aggravation.
Grumgutz laughed, gunning the engine on his bike and said, "What Louie's sayin' is you 'Busta boyz, get Mobbed up! Kankrusha, Dredhunta, youz both workin' together. Get ALL DA DAKKA!"
The two Nobz gasped as the strange idea filled their minds. Work together? Was it even possible?
Then, as if on cue, Big Mek Wingnut tossed out a massive bag of teeth and a giant crate of rockets.
Bad Moonz greed pushed aside common sense with all the subtletly of a Squiggoth in a China shop and the two Nobz decided to work together just this once. After all, there was a lot of fun to be had. And profit.
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Objectives:
Mission Critical Objective 6, More Speed (3 or more units advance), Secure Objective 6, Get 'em Boss (Warlord kills in Fight), Give 'em some Dakka (destroy unit in shooting), Behind Enemy Lines
Wow, I got some good cards. Or at least, some things that I can probably get done this turn.
The Stormboyz get a massive 6 on their advance roll and we're all surprised as they hurtle over the Hemlocks (+1 to move AND advance means they motor hella far). My unit of grots is already on Objective 6, so we're good for that.
I move a unit of Shootas up with the Boss to give the Stormboyz advance and charge.
And lastly, I Mob Up the Tankbustas into a massive 20 man blob.
Psychic phase has me give Warpath to the Stormboyz (just in case) and then Da Jump one mob of Shootas to the right flank.
I use MORE DAKKA and SHOWIN' OFF to easily down both Eldar fliers (!) as the strats let me fire twice, 20 shots each time, hitting on 5,6's that "explode" into additional shots that ALL re-roll misses.
Needless to say, we're both a bit gobsmacked. The Stormboyz then hilariously use Loot It to give them 5+ armor, and then they assault into the Rangers and wipe them both with no problems. The Shoota boyz do a few wounds and then do about a total of a half dozen or so against the right Wave Serpent (meh)...
Picture Caption: That... that was a lot of Dakka...
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Turn 2: Eldar
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Objectives:
Scour the Skies, Assassinate, Defend Objective 4, Strands of Fate (Objective 3), Secure Objective 3
My opponent doesn't draw anything amazing, but is more concerned about the 50 or so Orks in his FACE. So, he mounts all of the Eldar into the unharmed Wave Serpent and then moves it far out to the left. The injured Wave Serpent moves up to screen.
The Guardians come in and my opponent actually uses them to screen the Wave Serpents, which is an interesting use, I suppose.
They do some shooting against the Stormboyz, but without Psychic support and my now improved (haha) 5+ save, the Rocket Boyz don't take a huge amount of damage.
Picture Caption: EMERGENCY EVAC!
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Turn 2: Orks (6 VPs)
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Farseer Dunkas swore as he saw a greenish shimmer and a horde of Orks bearing rockets appeared from a greenish portal. They were carrying an almost comical amount of firepower, with primitive rocket launchers in either hand, and small Gretchin practically laden down with extra ammunition.
"Pilot, engage defensive maneuvers! Don't give them an opportunity to hit us!"
But, for all their attempts, not even the most skilled Eldar could keep themselves safe from the massive Tankbusta mob. For all Orks know one thing: If you fill the air with Dakka thick enough, somethin's gonna take a pounding.
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Objectives:
Get 'em Boss (Warlord kills in Fight), Domination, Defend Objective 6, Blood and Guts,'Ere we Go
Right, my cards really want me to go and beat some faces. I can do that.
The Boss moves up to help the Stormboyz who go up to try and smash some Guardians. I start to move the Shoota boyz over, but they're pretty far away...
I consider Da Jumping my other Shoota Mob over, but then I realize... Tankbustas.
So, the Tankbustas end up jumping over and again use the same combo of Double Shot-Exploding 5/6's and wipe BOTH Wave Serpents. Wow. Just... wow.
The Tankbustas and the Stormboyz assault in with the Boss and wipe the Guardians for some minor losses.
Picture Caption: Krump them too!
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Turn 3: Eldar
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Objectives:
Scour the Skies, Assassinate, Strands of Fate (Objective 3), Secure Objective 5
Having lost a few Dark Reapers, my opponent decides that he needs to try and save some face and break out of the Ork hole he's in. So he shoots and assaults the Stormboyz, ALMOST wiping them out. But, as there's a massive horde of Orks next door, our morale holds.
Picture Caption: The Eldar are... what? That's... unexpected.
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Turn 3: Orks (11 VPs)
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Domination, Secure Objective 3, Kingslayer, Secure Objective 4
The Eldar still haven't scored a point yet, but it's all but over for the Craftworlders. I just assault the Tankbustas in and the attacks down everything except for the Farseer.
Picture Caption: Yeah, this is kind of over...
And with that, my opponent concedes.
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Result: ORK VICTORY!
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Post-Game Thoughts
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Wow, just... wow.
My opponent and I were both more than a bit surprised as to how much shooting the Tankbustas put out.
Those two strats with Mobbed up squads put out pretty much Knight-killing power and those Eldar vehicles didn't stand a chance.
Granted, it's still on S4 6+ save models, but the amount of offensive power is just frightening.
I have noticed a few things though:
1. I could use some speed. Ork Boyz are fine for hitting screens and not very fast moving things that I can surround and beat on, but fast moving flyers are going to be hard to hurt with just choppas.
2. Stormboyz are hella good, but really expensive. 30 come out to more than 250 points, which is a lot for a single mob. But, still, I can see why everyone raves about those fast blokes as they are amazingly fast and hitty. As an aside, the whole Loot It strat was kind of useful as it made them 5+ saves which actually helped versus Shuriken Catapults.
Not sure what to try next, but Orks are still fun!
Let me know what you all think.
Best,
-BT
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Epilogue
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Laughter came out of the hulkish throat of Warlord Grumgutz Bitzgrabber as he held aloft the mostly broken body of Farseer Dunkas.
"You done gave us a good run, Panzee. Any last words?"
The Farseer paused and said, "My only regret... is that I could not... save... Lorilune."
Grumgutz was about to smash down with his enormous Daemon-Klaw and then paused.
"Say dat again."
Dunkas frowned, the blood swimming in his head, blurring his vision, "I'll not take orders from you, Ork. My daughter will come for you. She will not stand by and watch you debase my mortal form. You will come to regret this."
And with that, the Farseer went limp, his consciousness fading.
Grumgutz sighed and looked back at Big Louie. There was a characteristically un-Orkish pause and the Warlord bellowed, "Right, dat's good enough. Dese Panzees ain't no fun no more. Done fell over faster than a Grot in a Squig pen. Let 'em go."
Brother-Captain-Primaris-Sergeant Skarbutz saluted and said, "Beggin' yer pardon, sir, but ain't dat gonna mean dat Panzee might come back and krump us?"
Grumgutz frowned, raised a massive hand and swatted Skarbutz across the face, knocking the Stormboy over so hard every one of his medals jingled like a windchime in a hurricane.
"I SAID dat this Panzee we let go. ANYONE ELSE SAY OTHERWISE?"
A quick look returned only sheepish glances, and Grumgutz nodded. With that, the Warlord drove back to Lorilune, who was doing her nails, sitting rather bored in the shade of a ruin.
"Back already? I take it that the even the Eldar have a few incompetents amongst them."
Grumgutz smirked and said, "Yeah, that was one bad Panzee, couldn't even beg for 'is life right."
Lorilune rolled her eyes and replied sarcastically, "Yes, Grumgutz, I'm sure that was remarkably interesting. Alatoics tend to be rather sticks-in-the-mud. You probably did their Craftworld a favor."
And, she added mentally, that meant that they would be far less likely to send another assassin squad.
The Warlord chuckled and said, "Yeah, I'm sure dat's exactly dat."
There was another pause and Grumgutz said, "I fought dat Panzees don't kill their own. Not enough of them around and what-not."
Lorilune sighed and said, "You'll find, Grumgutz that things are rather complicated. And it's not as if we're all blood-relations. You're lucky I don't know them or I might actually be offended."
The Warlord nodded, "Yep, lucky that. You know, Louie, you done make a good Ork."
Lorilune shook her head and said, "And you, Grumgutz, would make a terrible Eldar."
The enormous Ork let go with a raucous laugh and said, "Yeah, dat's right Louie, dat's just right after all..."
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