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Well it sounds like overwhelming firepower and hit penalties are the way to succeed this edition, things are looking up for the Tau then?

I seem to recall you did a similar thing with Grumgutz and Da Big Five, they were becoming unstoppable so you shelved them for a while until the meta shifted. I guess we'll either not see the Eldar for a bit, or at least they'd look very different.

On that note, I know you're looking at playing with the new codices at the moment (yes GW, the plural of codex is and always has been codices, not codexes), but it'd be nice to see Da Big Five on the field again, even if just for a one off.

Of the two; Tau or Dark Eldar, I'd probably rather read a Tau one next as they're an army I've got, it'd be nice to see how they're doing this edition.

Looking forward to the next report and as always,

Job's a good un!
Hi all!

Thank you for the kind words and your patience!

The rep is now finished and yes, more reps in the future to come.

Either Tau or the Dark Eldar, both dexes are looking good, so not sure yet.

In the meantime, please enjoy!


Turn 1: Custodes

"Eldar?  What are those limp-wristed Xenos doing here?"  Colonel Switcher put down his magna-goggles, scowling in distaste.  He barked into his comm-bead, "Right, men, we'll hold the back-field.  Shield-Captain, I trust that you can handle those nuisances?"

Shield-Captain Cogliostro perked up.  "Really?  Me?  You... trust me to take the front-line?"

Switcher raised an eyebrow at the response.  That high-pitched flurry of words was not what he was expecting.  "Yes... sir," he replied guardedly.

Turning to his fellow Custodes, Cogliostro said jauntily, "Did you hear that everyone?  The Guardsmen said that I get to take the front!  We're actually going to fight and I get to lead us!"

The distasteful murmuring from the other giants made Switcher frown.  He hoped that his confidence was not misplaced...


My opponent has a bit of a tough first turn choice, as he decides to go around to my left flank, moving the bikes around the big center building.

The IG stay put save all the characters that run around to hide behind the Tank.

Shooting is a bit lack-luster mostly due to my -2 to hit on the Rangers.
The Hurricaine bolters do a number, nearly wiping out a Ranger squad.
Hilariously enough, the entire IG shoots at the Rangers hiding in the trees in the backfield and do... no damage.

And with that, it's the Eldar's turn...

Picture Caption: Ok, so -2 to hit is kind of big deal.  Rangers love it though!

Turn 1: Eldar

"Autarch!  We are coming under heavy fire!"

Autarch Lennara sighed, glancing down-field at the larger-than-normal Astartes that were racing towards their front lines.  They actually had something that didn't have wheels or look like brick with wings.  How unexpected.

"Autarch!" howled the Warlock again, holding his head dramatically.

Lennara let go another sigh and said, "Yes, yes.  Dunkas, get out here.  Warlock, signal the Spears to strike.  Let us show the Mon-Keigh what the Eldar can really do."


The Eldar come out of hiding as I need to do damage to the Custodes.

The Reapers and the Farseer come out of their Serpents.  The Warlock boosts out to my right flank where I trail out the Spears in a long column to the front line.  The Hawks drop down eyeing the IG line.

Quicken goes off on the Spears, who boost forwards, landing right in front of the IG lines.  Doom and Guide go off, targeting the front most Custodes.

The Hawks and Rangers do terrible damage to the front lines of the IG, basically wiping two Infantry Squads.  All of the Backfield Eldar fire on the front-most Custodes squad and barely wipe it out (those guys are tough, but re-rolling wounds barely edge it out!).

My opponent thinks he's safe, but I then use the Saim-Hann Strategem to let the bikes assault!

The Spears assault in, taking a loss in overwatch, finishing out the last IG squad and also some damage to the Tank.  Most importantly, I manage to surround the tank and consolidate into the Characters behind it!  The IG try to hit back, doing a wound, but the Spears are tough and stick it out.

Picture Caption: Though the enemy is giant and golden, his underbelly is soft and full of Guardsmen!

Turn 2: Custodes

"Colonel!  Enemy contact!"

Switcher ducked behind the Lemun Russ again as more sniper fire bounced off it's thick hull.  The Eldar were like flies on Grox-pies.  At least they didn't have anything that could really threaten...

Screams from his men brought his attention to the fore once more as Eldar fell from the sky on wings dropping down point-accurate Las-fire that tore into the Guardsmen.  Then, there was a streak of light and suddenly Eldar Jetbikes were in their midst, lances skewering those before them like some kind of obscene Rough Riders.

Things were going to be harder than he thought.


The Shield-Captain decides to turn back and help his beleaguered backfield.  The other two squads of Jetbikes move up.  The IG try to move in and push the spears off of them.

Shooting has the Reapers take minimal damage as they're far out of rapid-fire range.
Smite hilariously fails.  The Infantry squad fires into the nearby Hawks, felling a few as they then get ready to get stuck in.

The IG assault in, doing some damage to the Spears, but the bikes just refuse to fall, keeping now everyone locked in.

Picture Caption: Can the bold Shield-Captain fight to save his tiny guides-men?

Turn 2: Eldar

More screams came from the Custodes as they fell, but no pity came up from the Eldar around them.  The Imperials had made their own noose, and the Eldar had done naught but tighten it.

Farseer Dunkas raised a hand to gesture the final strike, but then a voice called up from behind him.


Dunkas turned his head and then brought his palm to his face.

His once-wife, the Autarch Lennara, had her Lance raised and ready for a tilting.

"You can't be serious, Lennara.  They're beaten."

"It doesn't matter, Dunkas, they're the Imperium's best.  I can't let this opportunity to test my mettle go by."

Dunkas sighed, "It doesn't...  You would jeopardize the entire battle for your own glory?  Lennara, they're better than..."

As the words escaped his lips, Dunkas swore inwardly to himself.  Although probably true, that was enough for the Autarch, whose brows knit together in defiance.

"Really, now, Dunkas," said Lennara icily, "If you think so, then I MUST insist.  Let us see who the better combatant really is..."

I pull the Bikes out of combat, and use the Eldar strategem to keep them usable this turn (pricey, but worth it). 

I get the Spiritseer out and things are going to get ugly.

I put Doom on one Jetbike Squad, Jinx on the other and then Guide goes down as well.
I try to put Restrain on the Shield-Captain, but he uses his cheeky Custodes Strategem and denies it!

Shooting and the subsequent assault has the Tank fall, the Infantry squad cleaned up and just to top it off killing almost all the Characters in a flurry of wounds.  I pop both Serpent's Wave Sheilds and then a massive flurry of shots wipes one Jetbike squad (wow) and pares the other down to just two models, one of which is heavily wounded.

I consider whether or not to go balls-out, but decide yeah, Lennara wants some glory.  She assaults in, finishing off one Custodes and wounding the other.  It hits her back, doing quite a bit of damage (ouch), but the Autarch survives!

Picture Caption: How to destroy Custodes in an easy 3 step method.  Step 1: Distract the really nasty HQ with back-stabbery.  Step 2: Apply all psychic buffs and debuffs.  Step 3: SHOOT EVERYTHING until Custodes-free.

Turn 3: Custodes

The Spears have a little time to celebrate before the Shield-Captain slams into them.  The IG Commander falls to the Shining Spear Exarch, who then decides (after a hilariously bad morale roll) to leg it.

Lennara sneaks a wound through the Custodes' armor and now the Custodes have... one model left.

Picture Caption: You done good though Spears.  You done good.

Turn 3: Eldar

There was a great cry that echoed through the battlefield as Shield-Captain Cogliostro cradled the broken body of Colonel Switcher.  The foul Xenos had taken his life, dashing all the dreams that he had dared put forth.  He and this little man were going to have great adventures.

For once, someone had appreciated him, not cared about his relative lack of height, or battle prowess, or you know... intelligence.  He had found a companion that was worth keeping around.  Like a puppy.  But with really big biceps.

Now all lost.  Could anything make matters worse?

And then if in response a huge wave of Eldar burst forth from a massive portal, pointing guns that fired fussilades that bounced off his armor.

Sighing, Cogliostro picked up his spear.

It was going to be one of those days.

The Guardians come in as well... the battle's kind of over.  The Eldar mount up in the backfield and start moving around to clean up if necessary.

The Guardians shoot into the Captain and do... well... not a whole lot.  I figure why not and then assault in, doing... yes... no damage.

The Shield-Captain slaps some of the Basket-Weavers around, and then the Custodes decide to call it.

Picture Caption: Well, might as well throw the Guardians in.  Why not?


Result: Eldar Victory!

Post-Game Thoughts: Well, that was kind of unnecessarily brutal.
My opponent had a lack-luster first turn and well... the Eldar must have realized that new Codexes came out so they wanted to go out of the spotlight strong.

And my did they impress.  Everything overperformed.  Everything.

Although the stars of the show have to be the Spears.
They survived so much more damage than they should have, and basically (with you know, help from the Hawks and Rangers) destroyed the entire IG force while taking minimal damage.  Granted, they couldn't take the Shield-Captain to the face, but well... what can you do?

I was really worried going in, but the combination of Doom, Wave Serpents and Reapers just chipped away at the Custodes and every loss basically hurt them so much they couldn't get back into the game.

Still, I think they have potential, but they need more help than just some IG to sit on the back objective!

As for the Eldar?  I think Lennara and Co. are going to have a special place in my heart, but they are clearly, clearly too hot right now.  I'll bring them back one day I'm sure, but for now, there's a lot of other armies that vie for my attention.  In short, you done good, girl, but you have to let some of the others have a bit of time to shine as well...



Autarch Lennara laughed heartily, watching the last of the Custodes speed off.  It had been a good day.  With a swift motion, she turned back to celebrate, and gasped at what she saw.  Or didn't see.

The battlefield was empty.  All of the Alatoic Craftworlders were gone.  Dunkas was gone.

As the sudden betrayal filtered through her mind, grief, anger and depression fought for dominance, and it was only a familiar voice that brought her back to her senses.


She turned to see her Warlock, sitting upon his Jetbike, looking nervously.

"WHAT?" she growled, letting anger have it's time to shine.  "What could you possibly say, Warlock?  We've been abandoned again!  I can't believe...  I mean, I should have known better.  Now here we are abandoned on an alien world with nothing to show for all of this!  What a waste of....  of..."

The Warlock swallowed and said, "Uh...  The Farseer had a message for you."

"Oh, really," said Lennara icely, "Now what could that be?"

Nervously, the Warlock said, "He said, umm... that he was taking his people to search for his... uh... your daughter.  Apparently she had gone missing in the middle of the attack and well... he said you should probably care more about that than the end of a one-sided battle."

Lennara opened and closed her mouth a few times and then blushed shamefully, covering her eyes.  "Yes, yes, Warlock.  Thank you.  We'll find her, even if takes another century or so.  A mother's work is never done..."


There was a mighty slam that blew off the hinges of the ramshackle shack and Big Louie of WAARGH! Grumgutz strutted out of her War-hut.  With a smirk on her lips, the Ex-Farseer strode out to the pack of Orks that were suddenly at attention.

Their de-facto sub-leader Big Mek Wingnut was pushed forwards, and even though the Ork towered over the small Eldar, sweat was flying off his brow like Grots in a minefield.

"Uh, Louie.  Hi.  You uh... changed yer clothes."

Lorilune glanced down at her clothes and swore, making the Orks jump back in response.  It was hard enough sneaking out of a Wave Serpent mid-combat, but her parents had, as usual, gotten themselves so worked up over the whole thing that they hadn't paid attention to one more Eldar getting out of their tank.  She had forgotten to change back into usual drab attire, and was wearing the newly furnished Saim-Hann robes.

"Inconsequential, Wingnut.  I take it you all are ready to march to the Spaceport?"

"But, uh, Louie," said the Ork, "Don't they got lots of Humies there?"

"No," said Lorilune raising an eyebrow, "I took care of that."

There was some murmuring amongst the Orks.  There was some kind of big scrum that had gone down far off, but nobody had thought much of it.  Clearly Louie was more powerful than any had thought of before.

Wingnut nodded, "Youz da Boss, Louie.  'Ey you lot!  You heard dat!  Now, let's get movin'!"

As the Orkish horde began moving forward, Lorilune looked back towards the battlefield she had crept away from.  In some way, it had been good to see her parents again, but one thing had become very clear: Family, like fish, become intolerable all too quickly.
Well I always enjoy reading about Big Louie, I can feel her frustration in that tank. Also great so see what the Orks are up to whilst she's off gallivanting with the other Eldar. Given that your army only has the one Farseer I presume her parents have decided that she'll be safer inside the Wave Serpent for the duration? I'm sure she'll take that well.

Sounds like, with it being Kill Points, you'd be better off targeting the Guardsmen but that might prove tricky. I'm guessing these golden guys enjoy the thrill of melee combat and it's not exactly going to be easy to outrun them.

But good luck (despite the fact that I'm sure this battle was concluded a while ago), looking forward to reading the outcome.
House Rules / Re: Minor rules changes
« Last post by Mabbz on March 27, 2018, 11:53:22 AM »
The first rules I've been thinking of recently are the various Explodes rules. The gist of them are that when a vehicle is reduced to zero wounds, roll a d6. On a 6, the vehicle explodes, inflicting mortal wounds on nearby units.

I want to change it so that you can overkill vehicles to increase the chance of explosion. I was thinking something like "for every wound lost after its last one, roll a d6. If any 6s are rolled, the vehicle explodes"

For example, a tank is on 2 wound left, when a lascannon successfully wounds it, and rolls a five for damage. As such, the player rolls 3d6, and any 6s result in an explosion

House Rules / Minor rules changes
« Last post by Mabbz on March 27, 2018, 11:42:09 AM »
Ever thought of a rule that doesn't exist, but you wish it did? And you don't make a new topic here to discuss it, because it's such a minor rules change?

Much like the battle anecdotes thread for people to share fun moments without writing a full battle report, this thread is for house rule ideas that don't really warrant a full thread.

For some examples of the kind of minor rules changes I mean, see the Tweak a unit contest here
Battle Reports / Re: Eldar Craftworlds vs Custodes/IG in "The Golden Giants" (03/18)
« Last post by Mabbz on March 27, 2018, 08:37:22 AM »
Hmm. On the one hand, you'll need a lot of firepower to bring the Custodes down. On the other hand, are they really that dangerous? Hurricane bolters aren't particularly deadly... (I've not fought Custodes yet)

Fluff wise, as a fan of the emperor's text-to-speech device, I approve of Custodes being weird. And it's nice to get a glimpse of what the Orks are up to.

Looking forward to the report.

Pre-Game Thoughts: Wow, this is going to be a tough one, my opponent has less units than I do and he has the ROCK HARD Custodes.  I don't have a lot of ways to give out heaps of Mortal Wounds or such, but I do have a LOT of shooting.  Still, those jetbikes are really fast and decently shooty with each having a Hurricaine Bolter (!) attached to them.  Plus, each being T6 and 4 Wounds means that basically I'm looking at having to down more than 40 wounds just for the Golden Giants.  At least the backfield isn't too scary with a almost minimal Guardsman battalion.  If I can get to that mostly unscathed, we'll be al good.  It's just getting there is going to be rough...


Mission: No Mercy (Kill Points)
Setup: Vanguard Strike (Diagnonals)

Well... Kill Points.  That's not great.  But, if I can do some Eldar wizardry, we should be all good.

We take turns deploying, and not too surprising, the Custodes all go up on the line looking across the table.  Thankfully, there's a big LoS blocking buildig in the middle of the board, so it's going to not be a straight-forward assault.  The Guardsmen are all nestled in the opposite corner and the Lemun Russ can't see into my deployment (thankfully).  The Infantry squads go around the Russ with the Characters behind the big tank.  There's not a lot of other LoS blocking, but thankfully some hills, craters and trees to break up the tedium (and you know... offer cover). 

I put the Wave Serpents in the mid-part of my deployment with two packs of Rangers out 27" from the Custodes  (you know, what with them having a 14" move and 12" double-tap AKA dead Rangers threat zone).  My last group of Rangers goes out to the far right flank with shots lined up with the IG Characters.  The Guardians and Spears go into the Webway, Hawks in Deep Strike reserve and the Jetbikes between the Wave Serpents.  Oh, and of course, Farseer and one Reaper in one Serpent and the Spiritseer and Reaper squad in the other.

Picture Caption: So that's like 10 Space Marine Captains.  That's not intimidating at all!
Forces and Allies of the Imperium / Re: New Tau Codex
« Last post by Mabbz on March 25, 2018, 10:03:57 PM »
Before the new codex, my army was 4 piranhas, a Coldstar, and some pathfinders with a fireblade and devilfish (I only play small, 35 power level games lately). The general tactic was to never get in combat, because everything was fast enough to dodge. It didn't always work (especially since I often played on 2'x4' boards) but it was fun and fluffy and kinda effective.

With the new codex, I'm probably going to stick with it. The main problem was a lack of heavy firepower, and a quad fusion Coldstar (optionally with fusion blades) should help nicely with that. Maybe throwing in a hammerhead or two as well, or some devilfish strike teams. Basically stay very mobile and treat every game as a bullfight, taking objectives only at the very end.

I'm still undecided on the Sept. Vior'la for boosted fish of fury? Dal'yth for a bit more ranged defence and emergency redeployment? Enclaves for fusion blades?
Forces and Allies of the Imperium / Re: New Tau Codex
« Last post by BigToof on March 25, 2018, 07:42:13 PM »
List building continues to pain me as I realize that I just don't know how to deal with a pure shooty build.

I'm so used to having something doing the hitting for me (i.e. allied Harlies or Eldar), that having nothing to even try and hit back against armies is kind of daunting.

Kroot are so mediocre (S4 1 Attack is kind of... meh) that I don't know how we can get board control other than just shooting the beans out of everything and just hoping.

I was considering a Farsight build, but not much is really good close up.

Bork'an seems good for the triple tap, but with so much either -1 at 12" or in your face turn 1 (Bloodletter/Berzerker bomb) that maybe just garden variety T'au is decent?

Gunlines are a possibility, but that seems so static and unfluffy that it makes my skin itch thinking about it.

But since Crisis Suits are so expensive (300 points for 3??) that maybe it's our only option?

Forces and Allies of the Imperium / Re: Most Underrated Units
« Last post by BigToof on March 25, 2018, 07:37:22 PM »
That's true.

Hadn't thought of it long-term it's just that the Eldar Guardians have been so rubbish about it for the last...  Well... 4 or so editions?

With the new Codex they can come out of the Webway, run up and finally do damage and even stick around and be general pains in the neck.

How were they in the early days?

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