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WAARGH! Grumgutz vs. Mech IG in "Da Quick n' Da Dead" (1500)

Started by BigToof, September 08, 2014, 02:19:00 AM

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BigToof

WAARGH! Grumgutz vs. Mech IG in "Da Quick n' Da Dead" (1500)
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Hi All,
No, not dead, just away for a bit :)  Coming back now with reps at the ready!

WARNING WARNING WARNING

This is a VERY SHORT Batrep.

As such, I will be putting it all out in one fell swoop and there is no BT points as it is just too cruel otherwise to gamble on the crushed hopes and dreams of the err... "crush-ee."

This game features the return of my fabled "Da Big Five," Nob Bikerz extraordinaire with their Warlord, Grumgutz Bitzgrabber as they valiently fight against Mech IG.
As one of my first games with the new codex, I was trying a lot of things out.

Nob Bikerz.  MANZ Missiles.  Mek Gunz.  Stormboyz.

A strange combination of things indeed.  Most of which didn't work in the last codex, or were so watered down by the end that they were almost forgettable.

That is NOT so anymore.

So, there's not a whole lot of tactical acumen, but there is fluff :)

Enjoy!

Best,
-BT

P.S.  Comments and Critiques are greatly appreciated!

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The Lists
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WAARGH! Grumgutz (1500): 68 Infantry, 1 Vehicle, 10 Artillery; 10 VPs
Warlord Grumgutz Bitzgrabber (Warboss w/PK, Warbike, Finkin' Kap)
Painboss Dok Kutta, Warbike
Da Big Five (Nob Bikerzx5 w/PKx2, Big Choppa, W!Banner, Bosspole)
MANZ Missile (Meganobzx3 in Trukk w/Ram)
MANZ Missile (Meganobzx3 in Trukk w/Ram)
Grotsx10 w/Runtherd, Squighound
Grotsx10 w/Runtherd, Squighound
Brother-Captain-Major-Sergeant Skarbutz (PK Nob, Bosspole) w/Stormboyzx25
Lootasx8
Da Shiny New Mek Guns (Traktor Beamzx2, KMKannonsx3)
Da Ol' Reliable Mek Guns (Lobbasx5)

Mech Guard 1500: 30 Infantry, 10 Vehicles; 11 VPs
Tank Commander Pask in Lemun Russ Punisher w/Lascannon, PC Sposons
-w/ Lemun Russ Executionersx2 w/Lascannon, PC Sposons
Vets w/Meltagunsx3, Autocannon in Chimera
Vets w/Meltagunsx3, Autocannon in Chimera
Vets w/Meltagunsx3, Autocannon in Chimera
Vendetta
Wyvern
Wyvern
Wyvern

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Mission: Purge the Alien (VPs)
Setup: Dawn of War (Night Fight: OFF)
Psychic: Wazzdat?
Warlord:
- Grumgutz: Infiltrate Warlord and 3 infantry units (oo!), Opponent has -1 to reserves
- Pask: Preferred Enemy
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Chapter One: The New Hat
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Warlord Grumgutz Bitzgrabber sat in the Kaptin's chair of his enormous Killkrooza "Gork's Fist."  The Warlord dwarfed the Orks around him, a monstrous example of Ork biology, having grown in size and stature from countless battles.  Non-Orks had always found the entire process of gaining size and mass due to winning battles somewhat illogical.  Orks, on the other hand, thought that non-Orks thought too much about most things.

Not that Orks didn't think.  In fact, cunning was the power embodied by the Ork god Mork, and Grumgutz had always valued a "kunnin' plan."  Case in point: His armada was on it's way to some kind of row going down on a planet system called "Terryn." 
The Warlord hadn't heard of it before, but rumours had gone out that it was a world where they made Dreads.  Not simple Deffdreads or even something on the level of a Gorkanaught, but something far bigger.  Like a Stompa, but sorta-Beakie.

Dreams filled with the promise of prize bitz filled the Warlord's mind ever since and in short order they had set course for Terryn.  But, just like always, the hummies were getting in his way. 

They had laid a pretty good wall of ships, blocking off the shortest path to Terryn.  Going around it would take time.  And explaining.  The former was a possibility with the Warbosses, but the whole concept of not going straight through seemed kind of like runnin' away.  But, there were enough hummies to make the whole WAARGH! stall out.  Maybe waste enough time for the hummies to move the really prime bitz to a safer place.  And that wouldn't do at all. 

So he sent out a call to his best Warpehead, Big Louie, who was slummin' it with the Tau as an undercover agent that Grumgutz had pretty much forgotten about during the whole dreaming of bitz business.  He had sent out Wingnut and that other Warboss that sat around playing with dollies, but, it was taking too much time getting them back and the Warbosses were starting to get itchy.
  Something had to be done. 

Louie was always good for the kunnin' plans, what with her bein a Panzee and all.  Lots of the Warbosses always looked down on the non-greenskin approach of thinkin' before running in with choppas whirling about.  But, Grumgutz, as a Blood Axe, had always appreciated that other point of view.  He'd worked with Panzees, hummies, and even Fish'eads, and some of 'em were pretty smart. 

In fact, the last big scrap he had was with a bunch of Fish'eads, and their leader was one that seemed smarter than the rest. But, he had fallen for Grumgutz's pateneted "runnin' away... not really" plan that involved a lot of distractions and Nob Bikerz to the face.  The Meks had taken apart the Fish'eads gear and they said there was somethin' in it he should see.  Grumgutz was half to bellowing when the doors to the bridge opened and in trotted a bunch of Meks with a fancy lookin' hat. 

It was big, big enough for even the Warlord's massive cranium and was filled to the brim with wires and speakers.  Topping it all off was a kind of humming, blinking box on top.

"Whazz this then?" grumbled the Warlord, looking at it in the way that most Orks looked at Mek creations, half-wondering when (not if) it was going to explode on them.

"It's a Hat," said one of the Meks.

Seeing that the explaination was clearly not enough, and about to result in a Trukk-sized Power Klaw to the gob, the Mek quickly added, "It's got a bit that we done dug outta dat Fish'Ead's gear.  Stroke of luck it was.  Fancier lookin' than the rest with all kinds of Fish'Ead glyphs and right sturdy too.  We put some wires in it and it...  it started talkin'."

The Warlord raised an eyebrow at this, and the other Meks nodded in agreement while stepping out of potential splattering range.

"Uh," continued the same Mek, "We done put it in a hat, Boss.  Speakers in it too.  Talks like a Fish'Ead, it does.  Can't figure out half of what it's sayin', but it sounds... y'know...  nobby."

Proffering up the hat, the Mek sighed in satisfaction as the Warlord picked it up with his non-Klaw hand, looked it over a few times and then placed it on his head.  One of the Meks carefully pushed a button on the side, and Grumgutz tried not to be a bit surprised when he heard a Fish'ead voice coming through loud and clear:

"Greetings, student of the Greater Good.  I have many names, but my most well-known moniker is that of Commander Puretide.  I will be your instructor in the ways of tactical acumen.  Together we will unravel the mysteries of the battlefield and find greater understanding in the myriad of possible scenarios you may encounter.  Let us begin..."

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Pre-Game Thoughts: Well, my opponent has indeed brought a surprise with Mech IG!  I haven't seen this kind of tank to man ratio since 5th edition!  He's running Pask, which I haven't had a chance to deal with yet, and it looks like I'm in for a bit of a beating with Wyvern in the picture as well.

As for me, I'm trying out a lot of new things: Stormboyz, Mek Guns (both new and old) and the supposedly improved MANZ missile (3 MANZ in a Trukk, fire and forget).  By request, I'm bringing Da Big Five and Grumgutz out of retirement.  The Nob Bikerz have supposedly taken a massive nerf, so I'll have to see how much of them is left.  The game looks pretty brutal, and I think a lot of it will be determined in the first few turns.  If I can get in and start krumpin', the game will swing the Orks way earlier.  If not, this could be a bit of a slaughter.

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Setup: We set the board up with one deployment zone having a long line of cover and a central ruin.  The other has two decent sized towers overlooking the no-man's land with a ruin in the central area.  Since the mission is VPs, it's best to get stuck in early (that is, if you're the Orks!).

I roll up Warlord, and it's really fun to have two rolls on Strategic (I consider it the best of the whole lot).  -1 to reserves is ok, but the BIG kicker is the infiltrate option.  I deploy Scarbutz and the Stormboyz in the center with the Missiles to the sides and the Mek Gunz on the towers.  I put Grumgutz with the Painboy and Nob Bikers to infiltrate, along with the Lootas.

My opponent now has a dillema.  The central ruin is really the only Russ-level cover, and if he castles in a corner, he'll be safe from Ork shooting and a potential flanking maneuver, but well... no cover.  And the thought of giving up that central ruin is too juicy (I suppose), so he goes all in the center, with the Russes in front, Wyvern right behind them and the Chimeras to the side.  It's pretty packed in that parking lot, but he looks ready to go.

I then infiltrate the Bikers onto one flank and the Lootas to the other.  That was a surprise, as I think he thought the Bikers were in reserve or something.

The IG fail to seize and the game is on!
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Interlude
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"I don't know what you been told, but Skarbutz' Boyz is mighty Bold!"

The tromping of well-polished boots and matching uniforms heralded the afternoon marching drill of Brother-Captain-Major-Sergeant Skarbutz and his Stormboyz.  Skarbutz was a good sized Nob, long since addicted to flying around with a mostly well-made Rokkit strapped to his back.  He wore a peaked hat taken from one of the hummie Commissars and took great abandon in maintaining discipline (or at least as much as you could with a band of Orks) with the young Stormboyz. 

Many new Orks had flocked to the banner of WAAARGH! Grumgutz, and more than a few young greenskins had been attracted to the idea of gettin' stuck in fast without waitin' for saving up teeth for a Warbike or Trukk.  There was just... limitations you had to deal with. 

Like blowing yourself up maybe less than half the time.  But that was half the fun.  The other was flashing out iron discipline and matching uniforms to the older Orks.  The stodgier of the Orks believed that only Beakies and the like needed to worry about colours and titles and what-not, but Skarbutz knew otherwise.

Like Grumgutz, he was a Blood Axe, which meant that he saw the potential in the "Leapin' Beakies," jetpack-wielding Space Marines that moved like lightning.  And if Beakies could do it, so could the Orks! 

Grumgutz must've seen promise in it too, otherwise why would his lot be assigned to the front to guard a Mek Gunz emplacement that was putting a beating on anything trying to get across the front lines?  Be it Beakie, Panzee or runty hummie, the Stormboyz would be there to put Choppa to face and stop anything even thinkin' about getting close.  They'd need a whole line of tanks to even think about it.

Skarbutz continued his drilling, bellowing in the mid-day sun:

"Sound off!"

"One Two!"

"Sound off!"

"...  ...  One Two!"

He was about to continue, when the ground started rumbling underneath him.  At first, he thought it was an earthquake (or maybe some bad squig-pie acting up), but then he heard cries of alarm from the Grots.  In no time at all, he saw it:  A line of hummie armor, as far as the eye could see.  Tanks of every size and imagination.  Some with really big guns too.  Skarbutz swallowed and looked at his Power Klaw.  Sometimes Gork and Mork were a bit too giving.

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"Commander!  Orks at the front, guarding artillery as the forward scouts predicted!"

Commander Halcyon Sharp turned in his chair.  The rumbling of his Lemun Russ, "The Emperor's Will," was almost deafening at times, but he had long since grown used to it.  Looking at him, Commander Sharp wasn't much to bat an eye at.  Slender, tall and wizened even with the life-extending drugs, it often looked like he couldn't rise from his chair, much less lead a battle. 
But, it wasn't his strength of arm that won battles.  Halcyon's Renegades had destroyed more than a fleet's worth of enemy tanks over countless engagements, and the weight of ruined heretic and Xenos armor would likely overburden a Battle Barge.  They were usually outnumbered, sometimes outgunned, but the quiet and surefire Commander had come out victorious time and time again.  His crew had said that it seemed like nary a shot went without striking true, and that if he wanted to, Halcyon could shoot out the sun. 

It wasn't entirely true, but the eerie accuracy of the ancient Commander was enough to order him back for another battle, this time against Orks.  Halcyon had faced Orks countless times, and the greenskins were always predictable.  It was odd, though, reports had suggested that a larger force, including the Warlord himself, might be in the area.  But then again, military intelligence was often anything but.

"Combat speed," ordered Halcyon almost at a whisper, "Let them come to us.  The Orks hold no surprises.  Hold steady and make every shot count."

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Turn 1: Orks
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Sergeant Blisscombe was the first to notice the strange patches of sand as the column advanced slowly through the ruined city. 
Most of the attention was focused on the very loud Orks ahead.  They were far away, but soon would be too close to comfort.  But, there weren't THAT many of them.  With a little luck, they could drop them all before they came within smelling distance. 
Blisscombe had always had a good sense of smell, which is what first cued him in as they came up to the large patches of sand that seemed slightly off-colour compared to the rest of the environs.  Some kind of strange stench seemed to eminate from the sand, as if it covered some kind of latrine or sewer.  In fact, it seemed almost... familiar. 

A flash of recognition hit his brain and he was about to report it in, when there was a roar of engines and a septet of enormous Orks riding ramshackle, but heavily armored and engined bikes roared out of their covered pit.

The huge Ork at their head laughed wildly while pointing an enormous claw in his direction.

"Looks like dat Fish'ead was pretty smart after all!  Get 'em Boyz!"

With a collective scream, the Orks advanced on them, firing wildly and brandishing gigantic axes and clubs. 

Blisscombe swallowed. 

This was unexpected.

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Right, so it's DAKKA TIME.  I move the Bikes up on the flank, making sure to get a good shot on their Chimera.  The Stormboyz all move forwards and run some of their number into cover.  The MANZ Missiles cruise forward, stopping as close as possible. 
Then the DAKKA starts.  The Lootas and Bikers both take out a Chimera for First and err... Second Blood.  The Mek Gunz then open up, with the KMKannons firing their AP2 blast on the Vets near the Boss and it goes well... sort of sideways into the Wyvern next to them.  One pen goes through cover, and I roll a 5...  My opponent and I both wince, as I share his pain regarding open-topped vehicles. 

The explosion takes out enough nearby Vets to force a morale check and the Vets run off the table!  The Lobbas then try their luck on the nearby Vet squad and it again goes off target, but close enough so I can get one Vet who was leaning against a Wyvern.  Oh, and the Wyvern itself too.  I manage to surprise myself by stunning the Wyvern and paring down the Vets to a decent number.  I have to say, Lobbas, you got a LOT better.


Picture Caption: SURPRISE!


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Turn 1: IG
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IG turns around and decides that EVERYTHING needs to be shot at.  The Tank Commander goes first, aiming at the upcoming Stormboyz and putting down the Split Fire order.  I'm really appalled by the amount of shots a Punisher puts down as he elminates about half of the 25 Stormboyz and wounding Skarbutz.  I make a pretty shaky leadership roll, and they stay put (for now).  The Plasmacutioners fire at the Nob Bikers.  I wince at this.

Let me tell you a story: The first time Da Big Five were completely routed was by Plasmacutioners coupled with Psyker Battle Squads.  Back then (in 5th), you didn't get FNP saves for AP2 and the PBS wyches were able to pretty much guarantee that you ran.  It was the death knell of many a Nob Biker force. 

This time, though, it's MUCH better, as I DO get my cover saves and the Chimera body blocks out most of the sposon fire.  In fact, I get some wounds, but not a single biker drops!
The Wyvern then opens up and after some thought, decides to take out most of my Lootas (sigh). 

Oh, and an interesting surprise: The Vets explode the MANZ missile closest to them (no surprise) and the MANZ inside fail their pinning test (again, no shock), but the Mob Rule result lets them pass, and no wounds are taken as they have 2+ armor!


Picture Caption: Punishers HURT.  But you know... those MANZ are really close right now.

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Turn 2: Orks
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Knockout blow time.  Everone moves up.  I deposit both MANZ in the Russ' collective faces and the Bikers go in to deal with the Wyvern and help with the Russes.  The Stormboyz clear some rubble and with a WAARGH!, they get stuck in easily with the remainder of the Vets.  I don't even have to shoot as the mass assault wrecks/explodes everything with treads and the Stormboyz take out the Vets in a flurry of Choppa action.



My opponent rolls for his reserves... and fails both rolls.

Well... umm... we check the rule and that means he auto-loses.

And with that it's...

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Result: ORK VICTORY!
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I think this one took more time to setup than play.  I actually feel kind of bad as my opponent was just shell-shocked that it just all fell over him.  But, let's do this unit by unit:

1.  Grumgutz
The Finkin' Kap is GOLD.  Getting infiltrate basically let me take out his mobility and then crush him Turn 2.  Granted, he didn't do a stellar job with keeping his army split up, but I'm not sure how much of that it would have mattered...  Still hits like a Trukk mounted on a Battlewagon and takes fire for Da Big Five.  Rock solid.
Grade: A.

2.  Panboy
Painboy on a BIKE?  Why didn't anyone think of it sooner?  Wait, they did, but it was on Nob Bikerz.  In any case, still great and FNP laughing at AP2 was a GOOD feeling.
Grade: A.

3.  Nob Bikerz
I'd give them an A too, as they are such terrors as in the tale of old, but they are perhaps a bit too much overkill for their points.  I do like the Bikers though, and I might experiment around with a Biker horde just to see how they do in comparison.
Grade: A-.

4.  MANZ Missiles
Point, shoot and forget.  If they make contact with armor, it's all over.  The Mob Rule is actually really beneficial to them, and I think they're one of the few winners to the whole new chart.  I might get them a Killsaw or Bosspole in the future as I like them so much.
Grade:A.

5.  Stormboyz
Fast, Fast Fast!  I was in my opponent's DZ on Turn 2 no problem and it was glorious. Just... really squishy.  But, cheap!  Oh, so cheaper than before!
Grade: B.

6.  Mek Gunz
LOBBAS ARE AWESOME!  Thanks to the removal of area cover rules, you can't hide from them anymore!  5 Lobbas for less than a hundred points is a steal.  The KMKannons are also pretty good, and it feels NICE to fire AP2 shots.
Grade: A- (Lobbas), B (KMKannons)

7.  Lootas
Always reliable.  Pricey, but you get what you pay for.  Are they better than Mek Guns?  It's... an ongoing debate.
Grade: B.

8.  Grotz
So sneaky they didn't even get onto the field!
Grade: C.

Overall, the new Codex has a lot of great tools and they are a lot of fun.  Nob Bikerz are still good, but there are units in there (and gear) that really make them stand out.  Are they OP?  No, not at all.  They are still an assault army in a shooting edition, but they have the tools to make it work.  I never ran Trukk boyz, so I don't feel the loss too much, but I still think the Orkz need some fast units to cover objectives in Maelstrom and also they need some reliable anti-tank and anti-air.  Also, not having a whit of anti-psyker is something that makes me more than a bit nervous.  Things to work with I suppose!

Let me know if there's something you'd like me to proxy up next time!

The WAARGH! has a good start and it's not stopping anytime soon!

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Epilogue
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Warlord Grumgutz Bitzgrabber nodded with satisfaction as the Lootas finished taking off all of the important bitz from the hummie tanks.  The fight had turned out even better than he thought.  Whatever the "Monty-Cow" the Fish'Ead was talking about certainly worked and there were a lot of secrets that he could scoop up from that hat.

In fact, there was some kind of Boss of the hummies in one of the tanks, and everything along the front went haywire when he went down.  The ships in orbit also panicked and gave the Ork Kroozas plenty of time to get stuck in.  In no time at all, the blockade was a scrapyard, and the hummie fleet was runnin' away.

Terryn was just a hop, skip and a jump away.  Grumgutz could taste those primo bitz right now. 

It was a good day to be an Ork.

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A sharp stab of pain woke Commander Halcyon Sharp.  He looked around in the crushed ruin of his once might tank.  Congealed blood lined the floor and only bodies of his crew stared back at him.  He tried to move, but he couldn't seem to move his legs.  Then he looked down and saw the hunk of metal piercing his side and through his back.  His spine.  Severed.  He wasn't leaving after all.  Something within Halcyon seemed to break. 

How many battles had he fought?  How much blood had he spilled?  And for what?  To be brought low by an Ork trick?

He would give anything, anything at all to be back at the command of his tank.  To grind his enemies down and hear their skulls break beneath his treads.

Anything.

And then something in the dark answered him...
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BigToof Points:

Cammerz: 8
Waaaghpower: 1
The Man They Call Jayne: 3
Mabbz: 6
Archon Sharrek: 3

Mabbz

Huh. Brutal. This is why I don't generally use reserves. Also, why I always give my vehicles enclosed crew compartments. Open topped is a killer.

I don't have much to say about the actual battle beyond that, so on with the fluff. You gave Grumgutz the Puretide Engram Chip. You know what'd be funny? Since the chip proved to successful, Grumgutz should go around stealing everything similar, like Kurov's Aquilla and The Tactical Auto-Reliquary of Tyberius and any others from codexi I don't have. Then they should all start arguing with each other.

Cammerz

Yay! Bigtoof's back! That was a brutally quick battle report there, I'm certainly glad to see that Da Big Five are still pulling their weight, lets see how many more battles it takes before your gaming group starts refusing to play them again.

I'd never heard of the MANZ Missile concept before but that certainly seems like an effective unit when up against massed armour like this, although if you'd lost the trukks too early then that'd be pretty much it for them.
I'm happy to see the Stormboyz being useful this edition but it'll be interesting to see if Lootas have lost their place in Ork armies.

I loved the fluff as usual, I think Mabbz has a great idea brewing there for a Grumgutz tactical argument collection. Now to find out what's becoming of Halcyon, sounds ominous to say the least, maybe a recurring enemy? I do like those.

Job's a good un BT! Looking forward to whatever you've got next.

BigToof

Hi All,
Thanks for the kind comments.

Glad to see that the fluff is still pleasing to the eye even though the game was so short :)

Not sure when I'll get the next one up, but hopefully sooner than later.

Thanks for the idea for the additional relics.
That's a very interesting idea, hmm...

Best,
-BT
BigToof Points:

Cammerz: 8
Waaaghpower: 1
The Man They Call Jayne: 3
Mabbz: 6
Archon Sharrek: 3