2nd Auric Battalion vs. Ork-Crons in "Girls and Guns" (1500, 9/2)

[BigToof]

2nd Auric Battalion vs. Ork-Crons in "Girls and Guns" (1500, 9/2)

Hi All,
Why another not-finished rep?  Mostly because of a dream I had.

I was awoken from a sound slumber to look at the eerie and scarred face of Lord Commissar Seamus O'Keefe.  He took a sharp intake from his filthy cheap cigar and blew it in my face.

"So, I hear you're not writing up my rep with the girls?!"

I backed back as best I could, "No, no, you see, Cammerz is under the impression that it's going to be Vasily and he's one of my biggest fans so I'm going to scramble to get a game in and..."

"And what?  Let that mewing Romanov milksop mess up the Imperial Guard's record?  Just to satisfy one man?  Have you no shame?  And what's this about bringing in ANOTHER fluff guard army?"

I stammered, "Uh, it's just another little army and..."

"And they're not even proper Guard, you came up with the excuse of Rogue Trader poppycock and then compounded it by GIVING them the Wolves?"

"I...  I..."

"Seamus O'Keefe saved the Wolves' furry buttocks two games ago!  Where's the writeup for that?"

"Well, Seamus, the guy was playing 250 points under what we were playing and we messed up the deployment rules, so I didn't feel that..."

"Balderdash!  Just weakness!  What are you, some little girl?"

I looked down and somehow I had transformed into Hermione Granger, you know, before she grew up and became all saucy.

"Uh... yes?"

"Then you can't fight, but you can write.  Both reps at the same time."

"I...  I can't do that Seamus, it's unheard of!  The forum dwellers will kill me!"

"Either them or me.  And I won't be nice about it."

And with that, I woke up.

And here's the start of the rep.

Please forgive me.

Best,
-BT

P.S.  C&C is greatly appreciated.

----------------
The Lists
----------------
The Imperial Alliance, "Girls and Guns" 1500pts: 73 Infantry, 1 Vehicle, 1 Fort; 11 VPs
The 2nd Auric Battalion
-Lord Commissar Seamus O'Keefe w/PF, Carapace Armor, Meltabomb
-Primaris Psyker Manfred Hellsreich
-Bone'Ead Brunhilde w/Ogryn Squad Doomkopf (Ogrynx5)
-Lt. Duncan Windsor-Smith w/Flamersx4
-Infantry Squad w/Lascannon
-Infantry Squad w/Lascannon
-Infantry Squad w/Lascannon
-The Blackhearts w/Overseer Donovan Glasgow (Vets w/Plasmagunsx3, Carapace)
-Lemun Russ Exterminator
-Aegis Defense Line w/Quadgun
The Order of the Holy Rose
-Cannoness Esmerelda w/Rosarius
-Battle Sistersx10 w/Meltagun, Multi-Melta, Vet Sister Angelica
-Seraphimx5 w/Hand Flamersx2, Vet Sister Elizabeth w/Eviscerator
-Retributorsx5 w/Heavy Boltersx4, Vet Sister Safira

Ork-Crons 1500pts: 89 Infantry, 4 Vehicles; 11 VPs
Necrons
-Overlord w/Scythe, Scarabs, SWeave
-Warriorsx5 w/Stormtek in Night Scythe
-Warriorsx5 w/Stormtek in Night Scythe
-Doom Scythe
-Doom Scythe
Orks
-Big Mek w/KFF
-Lootasx15
-Shootasx30 w/Big Shootasx3
-Shootasx30 w/Big Shootasx3

-------------------------------
Chapter One: The Saga Continues
-------------------------------

Lord Commissar Seamus O'Keefe snorted, looking at the action report.  Another squad of Orks were moving off planet.  Something was going on.

He looked around at his rag-tag bunch of Guardsmen.  The Imperial Guard had left Tarract, the once proud, proud star of the Imperium, but O'Keefe had not left, which meant that the fight, was in fact, still going on.  Unfortunately, he was running out of men, which meant that although there was more killing for him, the ground they made couldn't be kept.  Which made it all the more challenging, he had to admit.

"Any chance we're going to leave this despicable planet soon?"

O'Keefe grunted and looked up to see the grumbling masked face of Primaris Psyker Manfred Hellsreich.  The Krieg Psyker had wandered in along with a few of his masked companions.  The Psyker was initially under some suspicion, but after he proved that he hated everyone and everything fairly equally, O'Keefe felt that he had a firm opinion of the man.

"Not until the fight is won, Hellsreich."

The Psyker snorted, "You know, I could change your mind."

"Yes, but then I'd snap your neck.  We'd have to see who'd be faster."

Hellsreich nodded, "Fine, fine.  But we had better do something before we run out of supplies and..."

"Keefer!  Keefer!"

Enormous footsteps echoed down the bunker's hall, and an enormous, barely feminine figure burst into the room.  Bone'ead Hilda was certainly excited about something.

"Yes, Hilda?"

"Dere's a signal!  We's got rein... rein... Help's a comin'!"

O'Keefe nodded, "Took them long enough.  Now, let's go out and say hi."

Hellsreich frowned, "You're serious?  There's not that many of us and the area is rife with Orks.  We're sure to run into them."

The Lord Commissar laughed, "Good.  Nothing like a little killing to make the time pass.  Hilda!  Tell the men to make ready.  We're on the move!"

-------------------------
Pre-Game Thoughts: Once again, I have no idea as to how this going to play out.  I haven't played Sisters, uh... ever really.  But I scoured the net and came up with what I hoped was a half decent list.  Too bad they don't have a lot of options sadly enough.  I pretty much kept O'Keefe's list the same.  I gave him a Psyker and a LR Exterminator for some backup.  I think I can probably out-dakka the Orks.  Maybe.  Not sure.  If they charge... Uh...  I don't know.  And the Flyers, as usual, scare me.  Have to see what the game is going to be...
-------------------------
Setup: Vanguard
Mission: Cleanse (VPs)
Warlord: O'Keefe: Legendary Fighter (yay!), Overlord: Can Control Objectives (sad trombone sound)
Psychic Powers: Hellsreich: Enfeeblement (mwahahaha), Endurance (BWAHAHAHA)
-------------------------

To Be Continued!

[Cammerz]

Well that was an interesting, and hilarious, start to the report. I can't think of many weirder situations than Lord Commissar Seamus O'Keefe yelling at Hermione Granger to write a battle report. And don't worry, we won't kill you for doing two at once, as long as there isn't any extended wait before we get to read something.
Its probably for the best that Vasily doesn't need to put up with the Sisters of Battle as well as everything else. I'm not sure I've ever felt as sorry for a fictional character as i do for him.

But I reckon Seamus has his work cut out for him in this one looking at those 4 'cron flyers and the nasty ork horde. Perhaps the Retributors would be good against the odd flyer, and if you fire all the lascannons up then theres a 50/50 chance that you'll hit something.

Looking forward to these reports. I don't mind which comes first, as long as the wait isn't too long.

[Rej]

Probably your best introduction to a report ever. I'm looking forward to the read and seeing how the Sisters play.

[BigToof]

Well that was an interesting, and hilarious, start to the report. I can't think of many weirder situations than Lord Commissar Seamus O'Keefe yelling at Hermione Granger to write a battle report. And don't worry, we won't kill you for doing two at once, as long as there isn't any extended wait before we get to read something.
Its probably for the best that Vasily doesn't need to put up with the Sisters of Battle as well as everything else. I'm not sure I've ever felt as sorry for a fictional character as i do for him.

But I reckon Seamus has his work cut out for him in this one looking at those 4 'cron flyers and the nasty ork horde. Perhaps the Retributors would be good against the odd flyer, and if you fire all the lascannons up then theres a 50/50 chance that you'll hit something.

Looking forward to these reports. I don't mind which comes first, as long as the wait isn't too long.

Hi Cammerz,
This was a weird list, and I must admit, it happened chronologically before Lady Jenna's list.
In fact, if you watch what will happen, a lot of tactical options pop up that I had not considered before.
Oh, and let me know if you like the fluff with the Sisters when they pop up.  I've been waiting for AGES to write them.

Probably your best introduction to a report ever. I'm looking forward to the read and seeing how the Sisters play.

Hi Rej,
Thanks for the reply.  I'm glad that the uh... unusual nature of the rep didn't throw you    As for the sisters, they actually play better as a detachment I think, as they don't have to have a lot of faith points to be effective.  They do play a lot different from my wolves (even though they are sadly not much cheaper...).

I am also realizing that I'm starting to reach maximum capacity for armies and fluff.
I mean, I have:
1) Vasily and Katya with Lady Sara
2) Y'stral and Thielbane
3) Grumgutz and Lorilune
4) Harry and Lady Jenna
5) O'Keefe and the Sisters
I'm not sure what's the best way to keep them  in a rotating schedule as since I publish at best bimonthly, it'll be 2-3 months until an army comes back in.
I considered using polls, but I know people don't vote on them as much as they used to, and I'm not quite sure what would be the best way to go around it.
If anyone has a good idea for the way of determining what should be next, I'd be glad to hear it.

Best,
-BT

[Cammerz]

I am also realizing that I'm starting to reach maximum capacity for armies and fluff.
I mean, I have:
1) Vasily and Katya with Lady Sara
2) Y'stral and Thielbane
3) Grumgutz and Lorilune
4) Harry and Lady Jenna
5) O'Keefe and the Sisters
I'm not sure what's the best way to keep them  in a rotating schedule as since I publish at best bimonthly, it'll be 2-3 months until an army comes back in.
I considered using polls, but I know people don't vote on them as much as they used to, and I'm not quite sure what would be the best way to go around it.
If anyone has a good idea for the way of determining what should be next, I'd be glad to hear it.

Perhaps you should write up a short story for each army, not based on a battle, just from the top of your head. Then you could discover which you prefer writing, the ones you prefer will probably be better and thus more people would want to read them.
And then you can post the short stories in the fluff section and have a quick poll where people vote for their favourite of the stories. With polls included on battle reports, I reckon quite a few people vote for the one which they just read because they've just seen it and they enjoyed what they read.

[BigToof]

I am also realizing that I'm starting to reach maximum capacity for armies and fluff.
I mean, I have:
1) Vasily and Katya with Lady Sara
2) Y'stral and Thielbane
3) Grumgutz and Lorilune
4) Harry and Lady Jenna
5) O'Keefe and the Sisters
I'm not sure what's the best way to keep them  in a rotating schedule as since I publish at best bimonthly, it'll be 2-3 months until an army comes back in.
I considered using polls, but I know people don't vote on them as much as they used to, and I'm not quite sure what would be the best way to go around it.
If anyone has a good idea for the way of determining what should be next, I'd be glad to hear it.

Perhaps you should write up a short story for each army, not based on a battle, just from the top of your head. Then you could discover which you prefer writing, the ones you prefer will probably be better and thus more people would want to read them.
And then you can post the short stories in the fluff section and have a quick poll where people vote for their favourite of the stories. With polls included on battle reports, I reckon quite a few people vote for the one which they just read because they've just seen it and they enjoyed what they read.

Thanks for the idea Cammerz.
What I think I might do is just get the reps together and offer up a poll perhaps before I write it, and then write what people seem to be interested in and rename the thread.
That sounds sort of reasonable I think...

Of course if noone votes then uh...  back to square one.

Best,
-BT

[BigToof]

Hi All,
Good news and bad news.

Good news: I've got some fluff for rep!

Bad news: Uh... this one's taking a bit longer as I have real-life issues that are clogging things up.  Will try to get things together sooner than later.  In any case, here's some bits, and enjoy!

C&C is always appreciated.

Best,
-BT

----------------

-------------------------
Act II: A Date with Destiny
------------------------

Celestian Esmerelda winced as she felt the ship rock again.  Alarm klaxons filled the air and smoke seemed to be wafting in from every corner.

What was going on?  The ship had barely transitioned back into Realspace.  They had expected combat, but not to this degree.  The ship shook again and distant screams echoed down the hall of the ship.  Esmerelda coughed, sealing on her helmet the best she could given the circumstances.  She tried again to reach the bridge and was surprised to hear the Canoness' voice.

"All Sisters, listen to me now, we are at the end of our voyage.  Make your way to the escape pods with all due haste.  May the Emperor be with you."

Esmerelda frowned.  Things were not right.  Their ship had seen battle before, but not to this overwhelming degree.  She switched to a private channel and addressed the Canoness.

"Canoness Juliana?  What is going on?  Why are we evacuating?"

The reply was slow, but the tone was warm, if solemn, "Esmerelda?  Good.  You're alive.  We are taking heavy fire.  Orks.  From all sides.  The ship is failing.  I cannot get to the escape pods to lead our sisters.  Go to the pods now."

"But, Canoness, they need..."

The reply this time was forceful, "Esmerelda.  Listen to me.  The paths to the pods are on fire.  The entire ship is dying.  I can no longer lead them.  They will need leadership wherever they go.  They trust you.  You will do well...  Canoness."

Esmerelda felt her heart drop, but steeled herself.  It was not the promotion she was expecting, but she at least knew what to say, "Ave Emperator, Juliana.  May the Throne guide you."

"And you, young one.  We will meet again, Emperor willing.  Now go, while there is still time."

--------------

"Not much in the way of reinforcements."

Lord Commissar Seamus O'Keefe glanced over at Primaris Psyker Hellsreich.  The Psyker was  leaning against a tree, casually watching the orbital fireworks.  An Imperial vessel was being shot to bits by a horde of Ork Kroozas and rocked by Ground-to-Space batteries.  Either the pilot was brave or suicidal, but damn if O'Keefe liked the cut of his jib.

"It's not the quantity of the matter that counts, Hellsreich.  You ought to know that.  Huh, looks like their dropping out pods.  Fair enough.  Hilda!  Get the men on the move, we'd better go see what's coming in!"

--------------------

Sister Esmerelda coughed, kicking open the door to her escape pod.  Things were not going well.  She glanced around at the small group of Sisters that had managed to escape with her.  Not even two dozen.  A pittance given the number that they had on The Emperor's Wrath.  Esmerelda stumbled out a bit, looking around and then up at the still bright orbital battle.  A number of Ork ships were laying into the Imperial ship, with no sign of assistance.  What was going on?  How did so many Orks get here so quickly?  Where were the Imperial Guard?  They were supposed to be the rear vanguard, not some kind of...

There was a beeping sound from her wrist and she looked down and swore when she saw her Chronometer.

"Hey, Esme!  Where's Juliana?  Is this some of prank?  Are you really in charge?"

Esmerelda looked up to see Sister Elizabeth.  "Big Ellie" was the statuesque, broad-shouldered leader of the Seraphim, and about as subtle and cultured as the Eviscerator she wore strapped to her back.

"Juliana...  Isn't coming with us Ellie.  We're on our own."

The tall Sister swore.  "Great, just great.  So any idea as to what we're supposed to be doing?  Where's the rest of the great big Imperial Guard?"

"Probably already dead."

The two Sisters looked over to see Sister Superior Serafina, packing up her Retributors' Heavy Bolters.  "If you check your chronometers, you'll see that we're far off schedule.  The Guard have already lost.  We're alone on a desolate, Ork-filled world, and soon going to die horribly."

Esmerelda sighed.  Serafina was always pragmatic and more than a little pessamistic.  But she was right.  They were months late, and the fact that there was no orbital support was more than a little telling.  They needed to find shelter and supplies.  She frowned.  This was not the way things were supposed to be working.  Juliana would know what to do, what to say.  She was the one they needed, not some scared, tiny Celestian who was just playing at being Canoness.  But, she had to say something and make a plan or...

"This is Lord Commissar Seamus O'Keefe of the 2nd Auric Battallion.  Any of you alive?"

Esmerelda turned to see a rag-tag bunch of Guardsmen emerge from the forest surrounding them.  She shook her head.  She was so caught up in her own inner workings she hadn't even heard them approach.  She was going to get them all killed.  Better that she just give up control now before...

"Yeah, we're alive!" yelled Sister Elizabeth.  She pointed over at Esmerelda and added with a grin, "And she's in charge.  We're just the hired help."

Esmerelda threw an icy glare at Ellie, who chuckled in return.  The Canoness fumed for a moment and then spoke, "Greetings.  I am Celestian...  I mean, Canoness Esmerelda of the Order of the Holy Rose.  Thank you for coming to our aid.  We were actually on our way to help you, but it is good to see friendly faces."

There was a snorting sound, and Esmerelda looked over to see a man dressed all in black with a long trenchcoat and gasmask covering his face.  "Friendly?  From the Eccliarchy?  That'd be a first.  Looks like you're going to be the only ones given the way your ship is taking a pounding from the batteries."

"An excellent idea, Hellsreich," boomed O'Keefe, "Those Greenskin guns will be perfect to help drive away those interloping green bastards.  Hilda!  Get the men moving!"

The Commissar turned and began running towards the guns at a furious pace.

"Well?" asked Sister Serafina, "Are we really going to follow him?  There's what?  Five?  Maybe Six dozen versus an entire army of Orks?  Sort of suicide.  Still, it might be better than starving to death and being eaten by Orks"

Sister Elizabeth laughed, "Won't it just?  Come on, Esme, are we really going to let the boys do our job for us?"

Esmerelda thought for a moment and then looked around, "No, no we cannot.  There is still hope we can salvage the ship.  Sisters of the Holy Rose, follow me to battle!"

-------------

Big Mek Lugnutz looked again at the big Know-Wotz that Warboss Grimskar had dropped off for him.  It was big, sort of fixed up and exceedingly dangerous.  In other words, a propa Ork device.  Lugnutz just wished he knew what it did. 

Grimskar had told him that it was some kind of Tellyporta that he bought from Warlord Grumgutz Bitznabber, but that didn't make any sense to Lugnutz.  He had seen Tellyportas before, and this one, although it had some of the propa bitz, it was all backwards.  As if it were supposed to suck gitz in, instead of spitting them out... 

Also rather telling was the way that the big red button that turned it on was smashed into a few hundred pieces, as if to show that something had happened.  Something probably pretty bad.  But nothing that was going to keep the Big Mek back, especially with Grimskar's orders looking him right in the face.  It would just take some time and...

"Lugnutz!  Lugnutz!"

The Big Mek looked over to see one of his Meks running over.

The Ork panted a bit out of breath, "We'z got hummies!"

Lugnutz shrugged, "So what?  Dey's always a bother.  Just give 'em some Dakka."

"No, no, dere's a lot of 'em this time!"

The Big Mek raised an eyebrow, "Eh?  'Ow many?"

The Mek frowned, thought deeply and said, "Er...  All of 'em?"

Lugnutz looked across the field he was working in and indeed saw a mass of hummies, all on foot running screaming at him. 

That was different.

"Right, then, looks like the hummies want a propa scrap after all!  Get da Boyz and tell 'em to bring all dere Dakka!  We'z got a good fight on our hands!"

-------------------------

To Be Continued!

[Cammerz]

Good to finally meet the Sisters of Battle. A few personalities popping up amongst their number but something tells me that they'll all be a little overshadowed by O'Keefe. Nevertheless, its good fluff.
As for the Ork tellyporta, I'm interested to see what it does. EDIT: Oh wait no, I've just had a look back at the army lists, I know exactly what it does.

Looking forward to the report.

[BigToof]

Good to finally meet the Sisters of Battle. A few personalities popping up amongst their number but something tells me that they'll all be a little overshadowed by O'Keefe. Nevertheless, its good fluff.
As for the Ork tellyporta, I'm interested to see what it does. EDIT: Oh wait no, I've just had a look back at the army lists, I know exactly what it does.

Looking forward to the report.

Hi Cammerz,
Thanks for the reply, hope you like this latest rep.
And I was hoping you might remember Da Gitsucka.  It was my plot device for... a year or two wasn't it? 

Best,
-BT

And here's the rest of the rep!

---------------

Setup: Well, I apparently did the Terrain Fairy a bad thing or two, as we rolled up another rather sparse table.  Or should I say that my half was rather sparse.  Of course it was my fault for dragging my Ageis line in a V-like formation and thus stretching it across 2 of the 6 sections.  The Orks though, got their pick of nice terrain, with a large ruin and a forest covered hill.  Some other trees and rubble packs were scattered about.  We forgot to check for what the forests were going to do until after the game had already gone underway a bit, so we just let it slide.

Orks won the roll to choose and took the opportunity to go first.
Not too surprisingly, he puts down both big units of Boyz near the front of his deployment zone with the Big Mek in the rear of the right unit.  Lootas go on the hill, everything else in reserve.

I put the Ogryn with O'Keefe and the Psyker just behind the Defense Line, with the Commissar manning the Quadgun.  The Retributors hunker down  to the right.  Vets and Battle Sisters to the right flank.  The blob with Canoness fills most of the rest of the space behind the line.  In the far back slightly to the right (in range of the lootas) goes the Lemun Russ and hiding behind that is Duncan's PCS (not the most valiant of things, but I don't think he'll survive a VP mission any other way).  Seraphim go in reserve for deep strike.

I try to seize, but of course fail.


Picture Caption: Yeah, this is gonna be swell...

---------------------------

Turn 1: Orks
-------------
Big Mek Lugnutz looked down at the hummies.  They weren't even propa Beakies, just runts.  It should be an easy fight.  He turned to his Meks and spoke in his best Boss voice,

"Alright you Meks, now listen up.  I's gonna go shoot up da hummies.  Now, don't do nuffin' until I's get back.  I...  What?"

One of the Meks who was waving his hand around spoke up, "But what about da Button?"

Lugnutz swivelled his head to look at the enormous Red Button on the What-Notz.  He was still not really sure what it did, but even he could feel the siren-like pull of the enormous button.

"'Specially dat Button!  None of you lot press it, you got it?"

"Even if we's is losin'?"

Lugnutz laughed, "Right, so if'n fact I's is gettin' in dat much trouble from dis little pack of runts then go aheads and push it."

The Meks seemed to nod appreciatively at that one.  Lugnutz shook his head.  It was just a little pack of hummies.  Some Shoota fire at their front line and they'd all go runnin' away.  What was anyone worried about?
----------------

With all the usual tact and delicacy of the Orks, the Boyz all advance.  The ones on the left get some trouble going through cover and have to run.  Shooting is rather... bad.  Even by Orkish standards.  I think I have to make one or two armor/cover saves and that's about that.


Picture Caption: Yeah...  That went straight up the ranks from Major Failure right up to General Failure.


Turn 1: IG/Sisters
--------------
"Commissar!  Commissar!"

O'Keefe turned his head to look behind him at Canoness Esmerelda, who was keeping her head down as Orkish fire rained down on their lines.  She looked worried, but O'Keefe couldn't understand why.  It was barely the start of the fight after all.

The Canoness yelled, "They're firing at us, aren't you even going to get down?"  She winced again as more of the shots flew just over her head.  Esmerelda took a furtive glance at the crude wall the Ogryn at made from the debris strewn around the battlefield.  Nothing more than a bunch of rusted tank doors and treads, but they were luckily holding.  She heard a chuckle and looked up to see the Commissar return to his station, still peering out at the Orks.

"Canoness, you'll find that the MOST dangerous place to be when fighting an Ork is the place that he's actually aiming."

O'Keefe nodded to Hilda who stood up, bellowing with howitzer-like intensity, "Chargin' Time!"

The other Ogryn nodded, grins crossing their meaty faces as they readied Ripper Guns and oversized frag grenades.

Esmerelda paled, "But there's dozens of them!  You'll be cut to pieces."

There was a slight chuckle as she saw the masked form of Psyker Hellsreich glowing with a baleful energy.  It rolled over him and into the Ogryn and O'Keefe.  The Sisters all jumped back and made signs of protection.

"Easy now," said Hellsreich, "Just a little something to help with the paper cuts that will be coming our way.  Sit back and watch Canoness.  It'll be a good show."
------------------
I cast Endurance on the Ogryn (oh yeah!).  The Vets and Battle Sisters shuffle out to the left. 

Shooting begins with a solid FRF/SRF that cuts down a small handful of Orks, but is quite nicely buttressed by the Vets and Sisters, cutting down about half a dozen from the right squad in total.  The Russ and Retributors and Quadgun gun down about another half dozen from the Lootas, getting them (thankfully) down to a more manageable size.


Picture Caption: This is just jabbing at each other.  No real casualties yet...

VPs:
IG/Sisters:  0
Ork/Necrons: 0


Turn 2: Orks
----------------
Lugnutz howled as shots from the Hummies were picking his Boyz apart.  He was losing Boyz faster than the hummies were dropping and they weren't the usual cut and run types.  No, these were serious trouble.

"Push Da Button!" he screamed into his talky-talk.

"What's dat?" came a somewhat scratchy reply.

"PUSH.  DA.  BUTTON!"

"Uh, ok Boss, hold on now."

A few moments later, there was a screeching sound from the Orkish Base, as if the Gods themselves were suddenly kicked in the tackle.  The roof then shook and erupted in a greenish blaze of energy as it tore free, bits flying all over the battlefield.  A lance of energy flew upwards and smashed like a hammer into the sky, exploding with a crackle.  The sky glowed, shimmered and then tore open with a howl as Orkish technology ripped apart the very fabric of reality.  It took a few moments for things to calm down, and when they did, all of the combatants looked up at a trio of very odd looking sleek ships.

Necron Overlord Gannon was not sure what had happened.  One moment he was prepared to attack a group of invading humans that had dared to land on his Tomb World.  The next, he was somewhere else entirely.  He checked the sensors, and at least noticed a familiar signal.  Humans.  And other creatures.  The others could wait.  The humans would die first, then the other living things would be destroyed.  This he swore.
---------------
Right, Necron time.

Two Night Scythes and a Doom Scythe come in.

They all move up to shoot at the Ogryn.  The Orks also advance, eager to pickup the pieces of whatever the Necrons are going to leave behind.

That is of course, if O'Keefe wasn't such a good shot.  The Lord Commissar and his WS5 Quadgun fire into the Doom Scythe, shattering it into a smoking crater.

The two Night Scythes obviously do not take kindly to this.  They fire into the Quadgun first, and it takes both Scythes to down the big gun, but they do it (aww...).

The Orks fire into the Battle Sisters and down one girl.  The Lootas fire into the Ogryn, but the Line and FNP keep them safe except for just a few wounds... that the Ogryn then regenerate!


Picture Caption: Ooh, now you done got them mad.


Turn 2: IG/Sisters
-------------
"Necrons," whispered Canoness Esmerelda, watching the sleek craft fly past after shooting their strange green weapons.

"Friends of yours?" snorted Hellsreich, who was brushing off some of the dirt kicked up by the strange craft.

"No," said Esmerelda, "They... murdrered... many of my Sisters."

She gritted her teeth.  She had heard the rumours of Sanctuary 101.  Of the tales of skeletal creatures and their eerie craft.  She had not felt rage in quite some time, but like an old friend it was coming back to the fore.

She threw a burning look at O'Keefe, "Commissar, you can do whatever you want to the Orks, but the Necrons must be destroyed."

The Commissar smirked, "Glad to see you finally found some fire!  Look after the men back here, I've got kilin' to do.  Hilda!  Sound the charge!  Let's see what those Orks are really made of!"
------------------

My Seraphim come in.  All is good.

I cast Enfeeble on the Mob to the left.  The Seraphim scatter a little, but land smack-dab right into front of the Lootas, who now have micro-seconds to live.

O'Keefe moves up to charge.

Shooting has Ellie and her girls throw down an arm-load of dice and they roast all of the Lootas as their Faith goes off.  (That's a re-roll wounds for all you new Sister fans )

I concentrate the rest of the fire into the Scythes and right Ork Mob.  The Russ opens fire and one of the Scythes is glanced to death.  The other takes a stray Lascannon and is thankfully now weapon-free.  The right Mob is cut down to about half strength or so.

O'Keefe then charges.  My opponent is shocked when the Ogryn down more than half the mob, but is even more when he finds out he can't hurt the big blokes as the Orks are now S2!
The Orks, still fearless, consolidate into the Ogryn, ending the turn.


Picture Caption: Ogryn, your one-stop shop for smashy.

VPs:
IG/Sisters:  4
Ork/Necrons: 0


Turn 3: Orks
------------
Sister Elizabeth smiled as the enormous Ork dueling her howled in pain.  Her Eviscerator dug in deep, but not enough to kill.  She shrugged.  Maybe next time.

"See ya, Ork, I've got better places to be."

Throwing a mock salute his way, she activated her Jetpack, and then swore as a glob of muck hit her intake.  Her engine failed, knocking her to the earth, where she was showered with filth as the Orks around her began to howl insults and throw garbage and debris at her.

Big Mek Lugnutz chuckled, "Da only place you's goin' hummie is da end of my Krumpin' Wrench!"
-------------
The Doom Scythe comes in.

The Shootas pull back to deal with the Seraphim.  The Night Scythe drops off his cargo of Lemun-Russ killin' Stormtek and friends.  The Doom Scythe fires first, roasting a good chunk of the Vets and explodes the Russ!  The Warriors, now without their primary target, fire into the Vets who thankfully manage to make some 4+ saves and come out of it without too many casualties.  The Seraphim are also shot up a lot, but thankfully, Ork inaccuracy knocks the wounds down to just a few.

In Assault, O'Keefe and the Ogryn crush the rest of the Orks.  The Seraphim are charged and throw down hand flamer templates doing, unfortunately, not too many wounds.  Ellie challenges the Big Mek, who accepts.  The other Seraphim down an Ork, but are cut apart for their trouble.  The Mek swings and bounces a wound off of Ellie's armor.  She takes a wound off the Mek, but things aren't looking good at all.  Luckily, I've got an ace up my sleeve as she tries to hit and run and... fails (oh, bother).

Oh and the Lord and Warriors walk in on the far left side, a bit not sure as to whether to get involved or not.


Picture Caption: I lose more Lemun Russes that way...


Turn 3: IG/Sisters
-----------
Elizabeth swore again, feeling her legs start to weaken as the enormous Ork beat down on her.  It had the advantage and knew it.  Any of the other Orks could easily take her down and they knew it too.  But they were having too much fun.  The Orks had formed a crude dueling circle, and were having a great laugh watching her try to defend herself as their leader kept knocking her around the ring like a rag doll. 

She raised her weapon to block another shot and then felt herself slip and fall in the mud.  Snarling, she looked over and saw one of the Orks had put his foot out.

"Whatsa matter Hummie?  You done fall down?  Let's make sure you stay down den."

The Ork raised his weapon and Elizabeth said a small prayer to the Emperor.  With luck he'd kill her in one shot.

"Pick on someone your own size!"

Ellie looked up and saw a magnificient sight as a horde of Ogryn slammed into the Orks, tearing them limb from limb.  Commissar O'Keefe was at their head, howling epithets.  He raised his Power Fist and gut-punched one of the Orks and then climbed over it's kneeling body to the middle of the ring.

Lugnutz frowned as the new hummie entered the ring.  It wasn't any bigger than the other hummie and it wasn't wearing fancier gear, but something about it made the Big Mek pause.
O'Keefe laughed and threw up his arms.

"What's wrong Ork?  Scared?  Free shot then.  Give it your best."

Howling with rage and appreciation, the Big Mek ran forwards swinging wildly.

Elizabeth looked away, not wanting to see the Commissar ripped in half by the enormous spiked wrench.  Then there was a smashing sound and she looked up.  The Ork lay on the ground, his face a smashed mess of bone and meat and his weapon lying inches from the Commissar.

O'Keefe chuckled and took another tug on his cigar.  "Orks.  Always too excited to swing straight the first time."

He started to walk off when Ellie stood up, walking over to the best of her ability.

"Uh, thanks."

O'Keefe kept walking.

She shook her head.  Never before had she wanted to have a man's baby so much.  If only so that the offspring could go around punching the daylights out of Greater Daemons.
-----------------

I cast Enfeeble on the Mek's squad.

Shooting does absolutely nothing to the Flyers, but I manage to shoot the dickens out of the Warriors and Cryptek.

O'Keefe charges in and successfully gets Glorious Intervention!  The Big Mek tries to hurt O'Keefe but down to S3, he couldn't do much.  O'Keefe Power-Fists the last wound off the Mek and the Ogryn just make a mess of the rest of the Mob.


Picture Caption: Glorious Freakin' Intervention!!

VPs:
IG/Sisters:  7
Ork/Necrons: 1


Turn 4: Orks
-----------
The Lord gets a bit closer.  The Stormtek gets back up and gets back on his Flyer.  The Flyers go off the board.


Turn 4: IG/Sisters
-----------
I put Endurance up on the Ogryn again.
O'Keefe goes for some cover.  I try to hide Ellie behind the hill.
Shooting does very little to the Lord and Warriors, as the Lord tanks all the shots.


Picture Caption: This is called the waiting game.

VPs:
IG/Sisters:  7
Ork/Necrons: 1


Turn 5: Orks
-----------
Flyers come back!
They line up the Ogryn and the Night Scythe dumps off the Cryptek to get shots on Ellie.
The Doom Scythe actually downs an ogryn despite them going to ground (aww... sadface).  Ellie survives the Cryptek's shooting.


Picture Caption: Never before has an opponent been so happy that he downed an Ogryn.


Turn 5: IG/Sisters
-----------
I move the Blob further away from the Necron overlord, who is still really far away.
Ellie jumps out and smashes her Cryptek.
Mass shooty once AGAIN does not too much to the flyers other than chip off a few hull points.


Picture Caption: Well, at least Ellie got to have fun.

VPs:
IG/Sisters:  8
Ork/Necrons: 1


Turn 6: Orks
----------
Flyers move up.  The Doom Scythe shoots at the Battle Sisters and Vets doing not a whole lot of damage as they go to ground.


Picture Caption: Yeah, that's about it.


With the enormous deficit, the Necron player calls it.

VPs:
IG/Sisters:  8
Ork/Necrons: 1

----------------
Result: IG/Sisters Victory
-------------------
Post-Game Thoughts: That was... surprisingly easy.  I didn't think that Orks would just fall apart like that but S2 Orks versus the Ogryn was just a hill they couldn't climb.  Also, it didn't hurt that the Orks were just rolling badly with shooting.  Especially that first round...  I think they bought ammo from the Deffskulls again...

Oh, again, let me do this Proper:


Unit Review:

O'Keefe: THE Man.  Saved Ellie, kept everyone super straightlaced and just Power-Fisted everything he could get his hands on.  Also Hella funny if I can ever get him on the Quadgun again.  WS5 twin-linked is just silly versus flyers.

Hellsreich: I'm not sure which was more rude: Regenerating Ogryn or S2 orks.  In either case, he made his points back in spades.

Ogryn: Wow, just... Wow.  They just erased both Hordes without breaking a sweat.

Duncan and PCS: Gave some decent Orders, but nothing got close enough to flame.

Blob: Never really got shot at, reliable thanks to the Canoness.  Overall quite good.

Vets: Decent plasma shots, overall not too shabby.

Russ: Once again a major target and destroyed early on, but got it's required fill of lootas and Scythes.

Canoness: Esme wasn't bad the first time around.  Kept everyone straight-laced and you know, pretty cheap for that.  Basically a slightly more expensive and better armed Commissar.

Seraphim: OMG.  Standout suicide squad.  Four templates, 4 pistols and a Frag Grenade = Massive Re-rollable wounds.  Would have been epic if I could have hit and run as well.

Battle Sisters: Solid shooting.  Can't ask more than that.

Retributors: Didn't actually need their rending this game, and a bit sad that I couldn't do much to the Flyers.  Still, they did easily make their weight in Orks back.

---------------

"Ellie!  You're alive!"

Esmerelda ran forwards, hugging her Seraphim Sister Superior, ignoring the globs of mud and muck hanging on her.

The tall Sister nodded, patting her on the back before pulling away, "Yeah, Esme, I'm alive, thanks to the Commissar, he totally saved my skin."

Esmerelda glanced over at O'Keefe who was stalking around, ordering his men to set the Ork guns to the ready.  She flushed a bit, as his eyes glanced over her.  He was an amazing man.  Never before had she seen a non-enhanced Warrior act in such a reckless, near-suicidal manner.  And yet somehow, he had not only come out on top, but also saved her friend.

"You know, someone should thank him," added Elizabeth.

Esmerelda nodded.

"Like... with sex."

Esmerelda frowned and looked back disapprovingly at her Sister.

"What?" Ellie shrugged.  "You were thinking it too!  I'm willing to share if it'll be a thing!"

The Canoness sighed, "Sister Elizabeth, we still have a lot of work to do, including setting up the surface-to-orbit cannons.  So, please, keep a firm grip on your libido until then?"

Ellie smirked and sarcastically added, "Of course, your all-mighty Canoness-ship.  I'll do just that.  Promise."

--------------------

[Vyper]

Great rep BT! I see O'Keefe is on the pull. 

Have to agree with you on Ogryns. I used a squad of six the other day against chaos and crons. Not only did they aggro and soak up a ton of fire, they killed off half a termi squad from shooting.

[Cammerz]

I've never really been into the whole idea of magic in 40k, none of my armies have psykers in them, I've always felt they they were purely for the realm of fantasy.
But reading your reports and I see just how devastating psykers can be. I don't see how anything short of mass anti-tank fire or perhaps some DCCWs could damage those Ogryns.

The seraphim look fun, but I do have a thing for dual-wielding pistols (which is why I'm so glad that anyone can do it this edition, my company commander might have more trouble surviving with two plasma pistols but it'll be fun all the same). And from a purely fluff perspective, eviscerators are usually cooler than powerfists.

I'm not sure how I feel about Sisters having relations with commissars, but then again O'Keefe is a rather exceptional commissar. As long as Esme keeps her vows then I'm sure it'll be alright.

So, another great report, I look forward to the next one.

Job's a good un!

[BigToof]

Hi All,
thank you for the very kind replies!

Great rep BT! I see O'Keefe is on the pull. 

Have to agree with you on Ogryns. I used a squad of six the other day against chaos and crons. Not only did they aggro and soak up a ton of fire, they killed off half a termi squad from shooting.

Hi Vyper,
I have some regrets in life, but one of the more recent is the tragedy that was the IG/Ork campaign that was wiped from existence.
It was so awesome and I consider it to be the high point of 5th for me.  I wish that the threads could somehow resurface as there was so much good fluff, battles and all.  So, when I had the opportunity to re-use O'Keefe, I couldn't help but try.
I think the LC is even better in this edition, as Psykers really do work well with them.  Ogryn are just scary if you can give them any buffs.  I shudder to think the damage they could do if they can get Prescience (re-roll all failed to hit in shooting and assault!).
Have you tried any allies yet, or still running pure IG?

I've never really been into the whole idea of magic in 40k, none of my armies have psykers in them, I've always felt they they were purely for the realm of fantasy.
But reading your reports and I see just how devastating psykers can be. I don't see how anything short of mass anti-tank fire or perhaps some DCCWs could damage those Ogryns.

The seraphim look fun, but I do have a thing for dual-wielding pistols (which is why I'm so glad that anyone can do it this edition, my company commander might have more trouble surviving with two plasma pistols but it'll be fun all the same). And from a purely fluff perspective, eviscerators are usually cooler than powerfists.

I'm not sure how I feel about Sisters having relations with commissars, but then again O'Keefe is a rather exceptional commissar. As long as Esme keeps her vows then I'm sure it'll be alright.

So, another great report, I look forward to the next one.

Job's a good un!

Hi Cammerz,
I must admit, I wasn't that into Psykers either until I tried Thielbane (who was pretty good) and Lady Jenna (who was awesome).  I admit that Hellsreich isn't as interesting a character as the other two, but if the Ogryn get buffs it just magnifies the carnage they can do.
I liked Ellie's antics as well, but don't worry about her being written all nasty.  If anything I tried to make it obvious that she knows very, very little about romantic what-nots.  In fact, all of the Sisters of the Holy Rose don't have much experience with male-female relations, so right now they're not quite sure what to do about O'Keefe.
Not all Sisters have the vow of Chastity though (both in the W40K universe and uh... the BTverse), so it may not be completely out of the question for some antics.  However, as they are expected to be warriors, it would be more than a bit frowned upon if anything would you know... come out of it without expressed authorization.  So no, not much chance of shenanigans.  But that won't stop certain individuals from talking it up a great storm

Best,
-BT

[Vyper]

Hi All,
thank you for the very kind replies!

Great rep BT! I see O'Keefe is on the pull. 

Have to agree with you on Ogryns. I used a squad of six the other day against chaos and crons. Not only did they aggro and soak up a ton of fire, they killed off half a termi squad from shooting.

Hi Vyper,
I have some regrets in life, but one of the more recent is the tragedy that was the IG/Ork campaign that was wiped from existence.
It was so awesome and I consider it to be the high point of 5th for me.  I wish that the threads could somehow resurface as there was so much good fluff, battles and all.  So, when I had the opportunity to re-use O'Keefe, I couldn't help but try.
I think the LC is even better in this edition, as Psykers really do work well with them.  Ogryn are just scary if you can give them any buffs.  I shudder to think the damage they could do if they can get Prescience (re-roll all failed to hit in shooting and assault!).
Have you tried any allies yet, or still running pure IG?

Most of my army lists work the other way, using guard as allies for some cheap AA. I knocked together a list using some old friends from that ork/ig campaign. 

[BigToof]

I like the list!  Looks fun with a bit of DA in the mix that I haven't seen for a while.

You simply must do Batreps.  I remember that you had great fluff going for your mates and I want to see it develop.

If you have any more of it, please post it here, even as a warm-up.  I'm trying to remember how you had things set, but I just remember that it looked very fun.

Best,
-BT

[Vyper]

I like the list!  Looks fun with a bit of DA in the mix that I haven't seen for a while.

You simply must do Batreps.  I remember that you had great fluff going for your mates and I want to see it develop.

If you have any more of it, please post it here, even as a warm-up.  I'm trying to remember how you had things set, but I just remember that it looked very fun.

Best,
-BT

Yeh I might see if I can get something up. Problem is my main opponent plays daemons and there is a fair amount of broken cheese in his list...

And the regiment was the 1st Gryphonne, specialising in grab chutes and melta weaponary.